This
article is mainly focused on perspectives that I have found in some
ultra-orthodox communities. However, to a subtle extent these perspectives may
exist in many other orthodox communities as well.
Being
described as “Eidle” is and has been an aspiring goal of both men and women in
many Jewish communities. Jewish educational institutions often go to great
lengths to create an environment that would be conducive towards modeling “Eidle”
behavior. Eidle is a Yidish word that implies a refined, sensitive, and/or
spiritually inclined individual. However, an incorrect understanding of the
evil inclination and human desires has led many to embrace the wrong approach
towards encouraging “Eidle” behavior and spiritual and religious achievement. In
fact, these mistaken beliefs have severely hampered the emotional, spiritual,
and religious growth of many individuals. In particular, I am referring to a
subtle, perhaps subconscious, fear of one becoming too vibrant or full of life.
For
instance, recently I heard (shockingly) that in the extremely regulated
community of New Square in Monsey, N.Y. boys are encouraged not to ride their
bikes after reaching a certain minimum age, even before Bar Mitzva!! What is the
fear and thought process behind creating such a rule? What perhaps is their
mistake? What are the consequences of such a belief system? I do not want to single out New Square singularly,
I remember sensing in certain communities there was an unspoken awareness that appearing
fit and lean often equated with less dedication to Torah and its way of life.
Somehow appearing slightly slouched and frail was a better indicator for
dedication to Torah. Obviously, Torah commands great respect for the elderly,
but it was as if some individuals embraced a frail look prematurely
to embody being “Eidle.” Likewise, a girl should not appear too beautiful
because of the fear that being too beautiful will convey a lack of Eifdlekite
(beign Eidle). It was as if a girl should appear presentable but very beautiful
should be avoided. Very beautiful would indicate that one is not “eidle” or
refined…And on and on, one can sense in many ultra orthodox communities the
concept of appearing “eidle” creates an aversion of appearing too centered in
one’s body, being too full of life or too vital…
Despite
the fact that when written out clearly, such a belief seems ridiculous, such
subtleties exist and create powerful undercurrents of what is acceptable in
certain communities.
What
is behind these beliefs in the above communities? I feel that it is the fear that
if one would feel too alive then they will be overcome by that power and
indulge further into worldly pleasures. For instance, in the example of riding
a bicycle. Imagine, riding your bike, the wind sweetly blowing against your
face, your lungs full of oxygen and your legs energized by the peddling. You
may feel the beauty of trees and nature around you and your heart is filled
with life and energy. One can mistakenly assume that being vitalized in such a
way will be detrimental to then walking into the study hall and pouring over a
Torah volume. One might think that you would be overcome by that renewed sense
of life force and the next step would be another worldly thrill, then another,
and before long you would leave the fold. This perspective would obviously
agree that one needs to take care of their health responsibly. But one should
keep their physical movement to a minimum and not move to flamboyantly. For instance,
jogging down a road with sneakers and sport attire should be avoided. Riding a
bike, motorcycle, or horse and feeling invigorated by the sensation of riding
through the air, feeling alive and strong should be avoided. Anything that
might invigorate you and make you feel “cool” should be avoided because it
would lead to further physical indulgence.
The
core mistake of the above thinking:
The
first Chasidic teacher the Bal Shem-tov famously taught a Chassidic insight on
the biblical passage the deals with helping a fellows donkey that is falling
under its load (Shemot, 25,5). The Bal Shemotv explains that metaphorically
this passage refers to an individual trying to engage with G-d and
spirituality. The donkey refers to the body of this individual, it is referred to
as “falling under its load” because it seemingly gets in the way of the
individuals G-dly journey. The corporealness of the body, its physical drives
and life force seem to hamper the individuals search. The Bal Shemtov with a
revolutionary insight states that as the verse directs, do not let the body
brake or fall down, but “life it up.” By lifting it up, ultimately the life and
vigor of the body powerfully helps one’s G-dly journey.
Likewise
3 times a day we pronounce to the best of our concentration the verses of the
Shma. In the first sentence we proclaim that we serve Hahsem "with all our
hearts” in the plural form. Chasidus explains that as Jews we are committing to
serve G-d with our bodily life force as well. Our bodily life force actually
helps us get to our spiritual goals faster and more efficiently than without
their assistance.
With
this in mind we can understand how feeling invigorated is not detrimental to
the G-dly process but integral. Riding a bike with the wind blowing in ones
face, running in a field and pounding your chest…riding a horse through the
meadows…(if you so wish) or whatever else you can do to feel alive and
passionate for life will not come at the detriment of spiritual serves but to
its aid. Don’t let the wrong definition of being Eidle get in your way of feeling
alive, powerful, or invigorated. Don't let the unhealthy expectations of your community get in the way of your personal happiness and spiritual development!
